If you live in Colorado and you tell me that you haven't noticed an excessive amount of miller moths this year, then I'll give you a knuckle sandwich. Pow! Right in the kisser! I can't sit at my desk, use the restroom or simply fill my water receptacle without being attacked by at least one pterodactyl sized moth. They're not just here in the ICOSA Studio, they're in my house, my garage and worse, my car. On Friday I noticed a moth flying in my car while driving to work. Of course it wasn't the end of the world, but just because I'm not terrified of them (like the future Mrs. Rubenstein), doesn't mean I don't think they're nasty little creatures. Anyway, I was trying to find the stupid slug with wings and of course it knew I was looking for it, so it naturally Houdinied into some cranny and I thought it was gone. Wrong. Flash forward to Tuesday when I'm getting out of my car at home from work. I get out of the car and when I peep in as I lock the car, there's the chalky, stiff, worthless body of the same POS lying dead on the driver seat. Obviously I had sat on it and killed it. That's not a fun way to kill moths, because then you have chalky, mustardy, nastiness all over your arse.

Supposedly CSU in Ft. Collins predicted an above average amount of miller moths this year in Colorado. They made this hypothesis based on the higher than normal amount of cutworms farmers were finding in April. The super moist spring and the increased number of flowering plants made for the perfect breading grounds during the moths' larvae cycle. Whomever found out that much about miller moths probably won a grand prize at some science fair in Kearney, Nebraska.

One quick tip to get rid of miller moths is to suspend a lightbulb above a bucket that's half-filled with soapy water. Let me know if that works, because I probably ain't tryin' it.